Can You Hold Your Baby Too Much? 99% of Real Parents Say No

By John Cruz

Last Updated:

Can you hold your baby too much?

Will it cause issues in the future?

Will it make them fussier and want to be carried more?

There are so many questions that come with such a simple topic and there are even more answers that can confuse everyone.

Especially new parents that never knew what to expect before the baby arrived.

So to clear up things a bit, we have brought in the dads to help with such an issue.

Yes, the dads.

Of course, we tend to think that moms are the ones who should be in charge and ultimately the ones who can give the answers but I think not.

At least not today.

No offense to you great moms but these days there is a lot that most moms can’t understand and that is what we are here to clarify.

So before you go putting baby down because you’re tired of holding them or feel that you’ve done enough carrying, let me give you some real advice from a real parent.

I am no doctor and I’m glad I’m not one either.

I’m not the qualified expert that everyone feels they should listen to but I can tell you that I am a father of 3 boys and 1 girl.

Often times they make things more complicated than they actually are and of course, everyone will believe anything they say.

That’s life and that’s simply the world we live in.

I’m a bit different and I have my thoughts on whether or not you can hold your baby too much.

I am glad that this does not require any medications or “expert” advice as this is something only real parents can advise on.

By real parents, I mean those that are actually involved with their kids’ lives.

Those that are with their kids at least half the time and do all the diaper changing and feeding on a very consistent basis.

For you part-time parents, I’m sorry but I’m sure you can’t relate.

And by part-time I don’t mean single parents that probably don’t have a choice but those that choose not to be a part of their kid’s lives.

Harsh, I know, but sometimes a nice reality check is all you need.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s see what comes with something so simple but complicated when it comes to the oh-so-popular question.


Can You Hold Your Baby Too Much?

The big fat answer is no.

You can never hold your baby too much and that is that.

What you should do is hold your baby as much as you can and not just when they need to be carried.

Not when it’s time to eat or time to be burped or time to be changed but just because.

As a new dad, I held my baby every time I had the chance and I’m not saying that to act like some kind of super-parent but because I enjoyed it.

But the reason I mention that is because of the many benefits that have come from doing such a thing and that’s what I want to share with you guys today.

Now when baby cries, we all know that they are doing it for a reason.

I mean, coming from such a warm place and battling their way out of mom, don’t you think that all they’d want to do is sleep?

Well, that’s what they want but they will cry if they actually need something.

If your baby is crying you should always check things just like you do when you prepare for the baby’s arrival.

  • Make sure they have a clean diaper on
  • Make sure thy aren’t too cold or too hot
  • Ensure they are comfortable
  • Make sure they are fed/burped

The main thing to understand here is that babies do not cry for no reason.

Babies cry because they usually NEED something but NEVER because they simply want your attention.

Maybe and only maybe when they are actually like a little person but from a newborn to about 9 months old, you can bet that baby will not cry just to get you to pick them up.

That’s another topic though and one that we can cover later.

For now, keep your anger in your back pocket, take a deep breath, and try to understand what the baby needs.

If comfort is all they need, pick them up and have fun with them.

Now if you want to know why some parents think that babies should not be carried all the time, let me explain why.

The Modern Parents

It really bothers me to see the parents of today (especially moms) and I don’t say this for some moms because most I know or see are usually in that same category.

They struggle to stop the baby from crying and it’s mostly because they really just need a diaper change.

Most responsible parents know this and can fix the problem almost immediately.

Change their diaper and voila!

The baby is back to bed.

The problem with a lot of parents these days is the fact that they aren’t with their babies enough to even know what they actually need.

Some have grandma and grandpa there to do everything, thinking that they are helping when they really aren’t.

If you are having problems with your baby and you are thinking that you don’t have to carry your baby a lot, you might just be a part of the modern parenting system.

It sucks but you can get out of it.

Know that baby should be carried and do it.

It’s not that complicated and it is your responsibility.

Science Says…

Don’t get me wrong, Science is great and I love everything about it.

It helps with life’s problems and it definitely helps with parenting and babies.

I’m not here to degrade the subject and/or say they are wrong but I want to simply focus on what we as humans do and should be doing regardless of what Science says.

Science proves that you CAN NOT hold your baby too much but it doesn’t take that to show you that you should carry your baby, a lot.

These are little people that will eventually become toddlers and then teenagers.

What you need to understand is that what you do when they are babies will affect how they are when they get older.

I’ve had my kids sleep on my chest when they are babies and they have done that even as old as 9 years old.

Carrying them and enjoying them shows them that they are loved.

They will remember that and guess what it will do?

It will make them behave better!

So unless you want a stubborn little brat, instead of trying to smother them with materialistic nonsense, pick them up and give them your undivided attention.

By undivided, this means putting that cellphone down and paying attention to them and not your so-called friends on IG that you’ve probably never even seen in your life.

Babies Won’t be Babies Forever

You ever hear the saying, “they grow so fast”?

Well, that can not be anything further from the truth and it says a lot to you parents about carrying your baby.

In less than a year’s time, you will be dealing with a real deal baby.

One that sleeps most of the time and actually wants to be carried.

So why in the world would you not want to carry them?

A year is not a long time and before you know it, they will be running around and could not care less if you carried them or not.

The main reason you want to carry them as much as you can is again, the fact that they will be much better-behaved kids later.

Spoil them with love by carrying them and it will help you a lot more than you think in the future.

Final Verdict – You Can Never Hold Your Baby Too Much

Babies are babies and they won’t be that way forever.

Think about the amount of time you will actually have to carry them and you will see that it is not that bad.

Carry them more than you should and you will see how comfortable they get and how much of a better sleep they have.

Carrying a baby too much is not a thing and you should not believe the popular belief as it was created by the lazy parent back in the day.

I remember how comfortable my kids were when they were babies and how I literally tried to bother them because they slept too much.

I bet if I didn’t show them that love and affection through actual carrying, they wouldn’t be the kids that they are today.

Remember now, all this carrying and dealing with the constant diaper changing will not last long.

See things that way and I’m sure this whole parenting thing will be a lot easier than others make it seem

So Why Do Parents Think That Holding a Baby Too Much is Wrong?

Because they’re lazy.

These days, parents are absolutely lazy and I’m not going to sugarcoat that either.

For one, they are probably not even with their babies for at least half the day.

Baby is with the babysitter, their grandparents, or somewhere else that is not with their actual parents.

Yup, the parents of today are the absolute worst.

Instead of thinking about their baby and spending time with them, they’re too busy posting pics of their baby on IG and then heading out to the club.

It’s sad but true and I’m sure those of you that don’t do that can agree.

This is also the reason for the extremely high rate of parents splitting up and kids growing up to be a problem when it’s not their fault.

Another thing that a lot of new parents do is complain.

“Why can’t my baby stop crying?”

“I have to sleep for work and my baby can’t go to sleep.”

Blah blah blah.

Like I mentioned earlier, babies cry for a reason and you probably don’t know that because you’re not around enough.

Pick up your baby, hold them like you care, and be the parent that you should be and not what you want to be.

Most especially, stop posting pics on IG like you’re the best parent out there and spend more time holding them instead.

If you got angry or felt offended by what I just said, you know you need to work on being a better parent.

Get mad all you want but you do have a responsibility that only YOU should be taking care of.

Conclusion – Carry Your Baby…All the Time

I have carried all my babies when they were well, babies, and even when they were asleep I still held them.

Rather than making it a chore like the crazy modern parent does, hold your baby and love them like they NEED to be loved.

If your baby is fussy and can’t stop crying, pick them up and carry them because that’s probably what they need, not want.

That’s of course if you’ve already changed their diaper, fed them, and provided everything else that is required from you as the parent.

Now if you are doing everything you need to do (without showing baby you’re stressed), then you might want to take them to the doctor as I’m sure they’ll tell you what the problem is.

Besides that, you must carry your baby, all the time.

I don’t care how lazy or how into everything else you are but baby needs you.

You are now responsible for another human and they deserve nothing but the best.

There’s no way around this so own up to your responsibility and do what is right for you and not for everyone else.

Now you tell me, can you really hold your baby too much?


About the author

With four humans of his own, John is our parenting expert. He loves being a dad, and when he's not trying to work on his golf game, you'll find him at his kid's soccer games or at the mall with his kids.

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